Meant to live
by ChellyL
Summary: This is the story of Lex Luthor and his sister Lena. Completely AU.
1. 6 years later

My take on the rift. The characters are not mine, they belong to DC comics, the WB and just about whomever else wants them accept me. The lyrics are from Switchfoot's song. We were meant to Live. I know I have another smallville story, but this has been brewing in my head for the last week.

The story of Lena Luthor

_Fumbling his confidence  
And wondering why the world has passed him by  
Hoping that he's bid for more than arguments  
And failed attempts to fly, fly_

Lena Luthor was a beautiful girl, standing at only five foot four she was slender with dark blue, almost sapphire, eyes and long brown hair. She was the spitting image of her mother and father, the perfect amalgamation of the Luthor patriarchs. She had beauty and brains, ambition and a heart, strength and vulnerability. This is not a story about her looks and personality. This is about the young woman that brought so much richness to one mans life only to take it with her in her passing and create the now best known rivalry in history.

From the moment she was born Lena adored her brother Alexander. Some people referred to him as Lex but she thought the nickname was too curt and harsh a way to describe the boy she called big brother so she referred to him as 'Alex' she was the only person in the world to do so but no one ever questioned it. And in reciprocation for her adoration Lex was absolutely taken with his little sister. Sure they had their obligatory bouts of sibling rivalry but maybe it was the five year age difference, maybe it was the heartache that they shared or maybe it was a sense that their time together was short, whatever it was they never stayed mad at each other long and if it weren't for the fact that they looked alike and shared the same last name you'd have mistaken them for best friends rather than brother and sister. They were quite complimentary to each other, where one lacked the other picked up the slack, and they were constantly learning from one another. She brought a sense of fun and silliness to Alex's otherwise stifling existence. He protected her from all that he could in an effort to preserve some sense of normalcy.

We all know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and men.

_We were meant to live for so much more  
Have we lost ourselves?  
Somewhere we live inside  
Somewhere we live inside  
We were meant to live for so much more  
Have we lost ourselves?  
Somewhere we live inside_

----Starting at the end of the story doesn't ruin it. It just makes the rest that much sadder----

Metropolis in the not too distant future

_Dreaming about Providence  
And whether mice or men have second tries  
Maybe we've been livin with our eyes half open  
Maybe we're bent and broken, broken_

Lex Luthor and Superman stood toe to toe on the top of what was now Lex Corp., the most successful company on three continents. Lex had inherited everything after his father died, after all he was now the sole heir. Clark's Superman persona and primary colored 'disguise' didn't intimidate him a bit. He stared bitterly into the eyes of the man he once called friend and considered a brother, hell he'd even let the guy take his baby sister out on a date once. Well not anymore. Now all he saw was an adversary, and Lex destroyed adversaries. Superman may have been standing in front of him but tonight all Lex saw was an old film reel in his minds eye it happened years ago but it was still fresh to him and it always ended the same, with is baby sister laying dead in his arms as the rain poured out of the sky.

Clark stared back trying to conjure up something to say to the man he once revered. Lex was still striking as ever and still in peak physical shape, he hadn't aged a day past 25 and probably never would. But Clark could see it in his features and the lifelessness of his eyes he was a changed man older on the inside. He knew this was his fault, that was never going to change and he gave up on the hope of forgiveness long ago. He gave up on forgiveness when he held Lex in place instead of letting him go to his sister while one of Smallville's meteor mutants killed his sister. Clark didn't want either of them to die but she never had a chance, she was good as dead when they got there, all he could do was keep Lex from meeting the same fate. In the end all it got him was expulsion from Lex's life. It was Clark's cross to bear and he did it well.

_We want more than this world's got to offer  
We want more than this world's got to offer  
We want more than the wars of our fathers  
And everything inside screams for second life, yeah_

Clark spoke up first, his voice was even and controlled, but underneath the situation was killing him. "She wouldn't have wanted us to wind up this way." 

"Don't you ever talk like you knew anything about her. You gave up that right a long time ago Clark." Lex was harsh.

"I know you don't believe me but I had to choose and I couldn't in good conscience let you go after her. You'd be dead too."

"Next time do me a favor and let me die. Get off my roof before I have you arrested for trespassing."

Clark was about to respond with a remark about which one of them the police preferred but thought the better of it. Not tonight, any other night but tonight. Because six years ago tonight Clark Kent had a choice to make save one friend and lose another or lose two friends. If you ask him is he would change his decision knowing what he does today you'd get a solid 'No' because to him an angry Lex is better than a dead Lex.

Lex turned around and walked away.

Far off in the distance you could hear the light hearted laughter of a girl as the Kansas wind blew her hair on a spring day in a town called Smallville. A moment frozen in time, a day to remember forever. Even more faintly you could hear the conversation.

"Come on Kent, don't tell me you're afraid to go skinny dipping."

"No I'm more afraid that your brother will kill me."

She chuckled at that. "Don't worry about Alex."

"Isn't that what girls with overprotective brothers always say just before the brother beats up the guy they're seeing?" Clark retorted.

"Well come in and we'll see." She said with a wink before disappearing under the water.

Clark shook his head as he shed his clothse and dove in after her.

_We were meant to live for so much more  
Have we lost ourselves?  
We were meant to live for so much more  
Have we lost ourselves?  
We were meant to live for so much more  
Have we lost ourselves?  
We were meant to live  
We were meant to live_

TBC


	2. First Impressions

Lex sat down at his desk. His office was dim, the only light was coming in from the streets below. His staff had gone home for the evening to be with their families, something he would never do. Classical music played softly in the background, the glass of scotch that sat next to him was his only companion.

In his hands was a picture taken what seemed to be a lifetime ago. He hardly recognized the two people in it, one from loss and the other because he was now buried under years of pain and anger. It was getting harder for him to remember certain things about her; her laugh, her voice, the smell of her perfume as she ran past him when she was late for school. Then there were the things he'd never forget; the first time he held her after she was born how soft and pink she was and those big blue eyes, the way she would bounce on the balls of her feet when she was excited about something, basically because it used to annoy him but today he'd give anything to see it one more time, her favorite drink at Starbucks, the day she came to live with him. The way she could make him laugh even in his darkest of moods, he could put the fear of god in men twice his age but to one teenage girl he was just her brother, no one to be afraid of. And then there was the day she died her last words to him and how still she was in his arms, that day would never be forgotten. He continued to look at the picture taken of Lena and himself the day she graduated from Smallville High School, he had his arm around her and they were smiling, she was dressed in her red graduation robe and cap with gold honors cords around her neck holding her diploma in front of her chest as proof that she was finished, he was so proud of her she had survived life in Smallville, graduated with honors and was headed for Oxford in the fall.

Two weeks later she was dead and Clark Kent was to blame.

Sometimes on nights like tonight he wondered what would have happened if their father hadn't sent her to Smallville so many years ago, or him for that matter. Where would they be today? Would she be alive or was she meant to die young? Why her and not him? Why did the one good thing in his life have to be taken from him, and so violently for that matter? No one could answer those questions, not even him and he was Lex Luthor. But one thing remained clear in his mind. He wouldn't have traded his time with her for anything in the world even with the pain that killed him a bit more each day.

----Smallville Kansas August 28, 2004----

Alien Ant Farm's, Attitude, plays in the background

Lena Luthor had never been to Smallville. After what happened to Alex so many years ago she never wanted to go there and her mother never would have let her, plus from what he had told her about it lately it didn't seem like she was missing much. The crap factory was the hub for all commerce and crap being the most worthwhile thing in a town didn't bode well with her. Then it happened, she had been kicked out of her boarding school. It looked like she was going to make it there too, she'd been there for seven years and they'd only threatened to throw her out twice, she and her friends enjoyed getting into a small amount of trouble when they were in Boston. No boarding school would look at her after the incident though. Lionel had had enough of his youngest child's behavior, she wasn't a bad kid just a bit impulsive, and decided on more of a scared straight approach to the situation. He was sending her to live with her brother in Smallville, after all it straightened him out, and a year at public school should be enough to keep her on the straight and narrow through college, besides he needed to show a bit more responsibility. Plus she worshipped Alex so she shouldn't be a disciplinary problem.

Well shouldn't is the operative in that sentence. Not to say that Lena was a bad kid, she just had a tendency to act before thinking and when you invert those two processes the consequences can be quite explosive, especially with her temper it was classic Luthor. Like what happened to get her kicked out of school, she had almost literally burnt it down because of an argument with her friends that most certainly got out of hand. She threw a hymnal at her ex-boyfriend's head after choir, missed, and sent a candelabra into a drapery that was not at all flame retardant. The schools' chapel went up like a torch starting a chain reaction throughout a few buildings. Luckily no one got hurt but that damage cost millions in repairs and rebuilding fees.

She stared out of the helicopter window at her future, corn, corn and more corn. "I've died and gone to green acres," she mumbled morosely. Oh yeah this was a happening place alright, she could literally feel herself dying from the boredom and she wasn't even on the ground yet. She'd tried to bribe the pilot to take her anywhere but Smallville before they even took off but he couldn't be bought, she mumbled something about 'Damn honest employees,' sat back in her seat and turned her silver Ipod mini on so she could sulk in peace. She just needed to see her brother and everything would be fine. Alex always made things right.

When they touched down she stepped out of the helicopter and surveyed the grounds around her, her sunglasses protected her eyes from the unobstructed sun as she looked around. She said, "Thanks dad," in an annoyed tone then headed inside to find her brother. The castle was massive but she navigated it pretty well. She found him alright, working in his office buried under paperwork. She cleared her throat before speaking up. "Excuse me but I'm looking for my brother, and I know you're not him because he knows Saturdays are for cartoons, Lucky Charms and hangovers not working." Her tone was light.

Lex's attention was immediately ripped from the spreadsheet on his screen and to the young woman walking toward him. He couldn't get over how much she'd grown in three years, he'd seen the pictures she sent him in e-mail but they didn't do the real thing any justice. His baby sister was turning into a woman, well not if he had anything to say about it. "Lena I wasn't expecting you until this evening."

"Yeah well dad decided to surprise you by shipping me off early. Oh wait. Surprise!" She threw her hands in the air like it was a surprise party and he was the guest of honor.

He chuckled and grabbed her up in a bear hug. "I'm so glad you're here."

She reciprocated the gesture. "Thanks. Seems like you're the only one who will take me lately."

He let her go before she stopped breathing because he was squeezing so hard. "Oh it's not that bad."

"Alex I burnt down a church and the better part of a school! The only people who do that wear white sheets and ride around in the middle of the night! You should have seen dad though, he almost had a coronary." She smirked at the memory of her father's rage.

"Did he do that thing where his nostrils flare and the vein in his forehead sticks out?"

"Oh yeah and he kept rubbing at his beard, I swear I thought he was going to rub that thing off."

"Well that vein is mine. It popped out the first time I got into serious trouble."

"Alright let's stop comparing ways we've nearly killed dad, because you'll always win, and you show me around this cow town."

"I really want to but can it wait two hours I have tons of paperwork to get through."

"No!"

"Lena come on." He pleaded.

"Alex it's Saturday and I'm in Smallville. Home of the crap factory and an excessive amount of corn. Take me out right now or I'm taking one of the cars and doing it myself."

"Your car's in the garage already."

She crossed her arms over her chest and cocked her hip out. "I want to take the Lotus."

"No, it's too much car for you."

"Who's gonna stop me, you?" She raised her right eyebrow, in challenge.

"I don't want you driving that car." His tone was serious.

"Then stop acting like an adult and be my brother."

"Two hours."

"Now."

They enjoyed their banter.

A wicked smile crossed her face.

"What are you thinking?" Lex asked suspiciously.

"Nothing." She quickly side stepped him and ran to the computer.

"Lena, Lena don't touch that!" He called after her.

"What am I gonna do, break it?" She quickly saved his spreadsheets and closed it down.

By the time he got to his desk the computer was off. "Alright but we're not staying out all afternoon, I do have to get some work done before Monday." 

"Yeah because the boss 'll fire you if it's late." She said sarcastically.

"Have you met dad? He just may."

She just rolled her eyes in reply.

He sighed in defeat. "Fine let's go. I could use some coffee anyway."

----Downtown Smallville----

Lena was surprised at how long it took to get from the castle to downtown, even with the way her brother drove. On their way in they had a conversation about summer, she had spent her summer visiting perspective colleges and she had found one she loved. Oxford, in England.

They were walking from the car to the Talon she had heard so much about when her cell phone rang, it was Lionel so she had to pick up. "You go ahead I'll be a minute. It's el duche"

"Alright." He disappeared through the doors.

After a brief yet tense conversation with her father Lena was more then happy to be getting some coffee, maybe she'd find some Baileys to put in it. When she walked through the doors she tried to find her brother but he was nowhere in sight. She saw two friendly looking girls talking at the counter and decided to ask if they knew where her brother was. The one sitting in front of the counter was blonde and, presumably, about the same height as her. The girl standing behind the counter with the apron on had brown hair and probably knew who her brother was because she worked for him.

Chloe heard the door chime and turned around, hoping it was Pete. What she saw though surprised her. A girl whom she'd never seen before walked in, and that was a rarity in Smallville. She looked out of place yet familiar and Chloe couldn't put her finger on why, and now she was headed toward her and Lana.

"Excuse me but I was wondering if either of you had seen my brother. He walked in here a few minutes ago."

"We just got through with a rush. Everyone kind of blurs together. What's he look like?" Lana tried to help.

"About six feet tall and bald. I believe he owns this building."

Both girls jaws dropped when they realized who she was describing.

Chloe closed her mouth only to have it open and no words come out. She took a breath and tried again. "Y-you mean Lex Luthor?"

"Yeah, Alex is my brother. And I take it you have idea who I am." She smiled. "I'm Lena Luthor, I just moved here from Boston."

"Hi, I'm Chloe Sullivan and this is Lana Lang."

"Hi."

"I thought the Luthors were from Metropolis." Lana looked confused.

Lena nodded in the affirmative. "We are, but I've been going to school in Boston for the last seven years."

"O-oh. Well Lex is in the office. I can get him for you."

"No that's alright. I'm sure he'll be out in a minute."

Chloe was raring to go, a new Luthor in town was pretty good gossip. "So Lena what brings you to Smallville? I mean Boston has to be a hundred times better then here."

"Well it is. But things just got too complicated there, and my father decided sending me here would straighten me out, or bore me to death. I'm really not sure which one he had in mind."

Chloe and Lana just smirked. "Give it time and you'll see how un-boring things can be around here."

"Chloe are you trying to scare my sister into leaving?" Lex asked as he walked up next to her.

"No I'm telling her the truth. This place is a haven for meteor freaks and whack jobs with an axe to grind."

"What the hell is a meteor freak?" Lena asked, Alex had never mentioned meteors or freaks to her before.

"It's nothing. Chloe just has a theory."

"A theory! Lex you've seen it yourself, this town, those rocks change people. Don't tell me you're buying into this conspiracy too!"

"So anyway Lena are you going to be attending Smallville High next year?" Lana changed the subject.

"Unfortunately."

"It's not that bad. Once you get used to it."

"I'm sure." Her tone showed she was not convinced.

"Have either of you seen Clark? I figured he'd be here."

"Oh, they went to Metropolis to see his grandpa."

"He's getting along with Mr. Kent?"

Lena was getting annoyed. They were talking about people and things she didn't know about and Alex was definitely keeping something from her.

"Someone mind telling me what's going on here?"

"Nothing. Chloe, Lana it was good seeing you but we have to be getting home."

"We just got here." She protested in disappointment.

"Well I have work to do."

"Fine." She was too tired to argue.

"Lena why don't you stay here with us?" Chloe suggested.

"Are you sure?" She asked.

"It's no problem. We could tell you the ins and outs of Smallville High."

"That sounds like a good idea, thanks."

"Oh and I can take you home. I have to come by later to do the books anyway."

"Sounds good to me. Lena I'll see you tonight."

"Okay."

The girls hung out at the coffee shop all afternoon and chatted about various things. Lana and Chloe were still astonished that Lex had kept his sister a secret for three years. She was upset that he had kept her a secret and even madder at him for keeping his friends a secret. Why would he do such a thing to her? He was obviously doing much better here than in Metropolis, why would he keep that progress from her? Something was definitely wrong with this picture and she'd find out exactly what.

----The next day----

It was Sunday, exactly one day before Lena started at Smallville high. She officially hated the town and the only two decent people were Lana and Chloe, other than them the town could burn as far as she was concerned. The few people she met either immediately kissed her ass or disdained her entire being when they learned who she was. School was going to be a pleasurable experience.

Clark walked into Lex's office Sunday. "Hey Lex I got your message to come over. What's up?"

"Nothing. Follow me Clark." Lex motioned for Clark to follow as he walked out of the room.

Clark wasn't all that impressed when they arrived at the pool, after all he had swam there a number of times since Lex moved to Smallville, but he humored Lex. They stopped in the entrance because someone was obviously using the facilities. There was a girl standing on the high dive with her back to them, she was wearing a two piece speedo type suit with her hair in a tight French braid. A man stood on the floor below talking to her.

"Alright keep your body stiff and tuck your chin."

"I know I've been doing this since I was 5."

"Well then do it right and we won't and we won't be having these conversations."

"I beg to differ."

"I want a Back Flying 1 ½ summersault. Can you do that, correctly?"

"Yes, and I can do that, correctly. Can you crawl out of my ass a smidge? You're getting a bit heavy." Clark bit back a laugh at the girl, whoever she was.

"Do it!"

"I'm doing it!" And she did just that, springing off the board and performing her dive with grace and ease. She came up and wiped the water out of her eyes, not noticing her audience, swam to the edge and got out of the pool. "And you worried."

"Your finish is off."

"You're crazy." She snatched the towel out of his hand and toweled off before wrapping it around her waist.

He shook his head. "I will see you next week. Practice on your own."

"Always do."

He walked out and met up with Lex as he walked toward them. "She is talented but stubborn."

"I'll make sure to bring it up with her."

The coach left and they continued toward her. Clark was appreciating the backside of this beauty when she suddenly turned around. The front was even more stunning than the back, big deep blue eyes, full lips, very nice chest, hard taught stomach, beautiful curves. Her well toned body had a nice tan, he could see her tan lines peaking out on her shoulders.

"Hey Alex. What's up?"

"Lena, this is Clark Kent. Clark this is my sister, Lena Luthor. Our father sent her here to finish high school."

"Dad has a wicked sense of humor."

He lost the grin and his jaw dropped to the floor with a crash, 'I was oogling Lex's sister, yeah I'm definitely going to hell,' he thought. His face turned a deep crimson. "H-hi." He awkwardly stuck his hand out to shake hers.

She smirked the trademark Luthor smirk and shook his hand.

'Yeah she definitely resembles Lex.' He thought.

"Clark Kent. I've heard about you." She waited for him to let go but he just kept staring at her. "Um can I have my hand back?"

"Oh yeah, sorry." He quickly let go and shoved his hands in his pockets. "S-so who told you about me?"

"Your friends Lana and Chloe."

"Oh. What'd they say?" What they had to say could either go very well for him or very bad.

"Basically that you're tall and you blush a lot."

This caused him to turn even more red. "Yeah, they say I'll grow out o it in a few years."

She looked up at him and quirked an eyebrow, yet another Luthorian trait. "I think it's kinda cute."

"Oh." His voice rose a few octaves. He quickly cleared it. "Well I have to get home. Lots of stuff to do before school starts."

Lex was enjoying Clark's torture more than any friend should but it was just too funny. "Are you sure Clark? I mean we could play pool or something."

"No I really have a lot of chores to catch up on, we were in Metropolis all weekend." Truth be told he had finished his chores half an hour after he got home but he really needed to leave before he embarrassed himself.

"Sure."

"So I'll see you on the bus tomorrow?"

"No. I drive. Why don't I pick you up, say 7:00."

"Sure that'd be great. It beats riding in Chloe's bug. Bye." He rushed out of the room at human speed but super sped home as soon as he hit the driveway.

"So he goes to my school, this may not be such a bad year after all, especially if all the guys look like that."

"I wouldn't get my hopes too high. Your two new friends, Chloe and Lana have been pining over him for awhile now and I don't think they'd take too kindly to you honing in on it their senior year. Besides he has had a serious Lana jones for some time now."

"Ah but it's my senior year too. And I have one thing going for me that they don't have."

"What's that?"

"I'm a Luthor, and Luthors get what Luthors want. It's the one valuable thing dad taught me."

"Really? Mine was never sleep with someone's wife if you can't crush them."

"That's disturbing, gross and just plain wrong."

"So is my little sister going after my best friend."

"I though Lex Luthor the loner badass didn't have friends, let alone best friends. Has country life changed you?"

"You might say that. Seriously be careful with Clark. He's a nice kid but you could get really hurt."

"I can take care of myself but thanks for looking out for me."

"Well you're my little sister. I have to."

----Kent farm----

Clark came rushing in the back door and almost knocked his mom over.

"Slow down there or someone's going or get hurt." She said holding a tray of cookies.

"Sorry mom. Where's dad?" He had a worried look on his face.

"He's out in the field but he should be back in a minute."

"Okay. Can I have a cookie?"

"Of course. Here." She handed him the tray.

Jonathan came in. "There you are, Clark. Do you think you could come back and help your old dad fix the fence in the back field."

"Yeah sure." He stopped to formulate his thoughts. "Umm you guys. Something kinda happened at Lex's."

"What's wrong sweetheart? Is Lex alright?" Martha asked.

"Is someone trying to kill him again?"

"No, nothing like that. Lex has a sister."

Martha and Jonathan both looked shocked.

Jonathan spoke first. "Well I don't think that's a call for concern son."

"Yeah, Lex is a very private person. We don't know everything about him."

"I just...He's kept her a secret for so long. She seems normal."

"I think for once you're the one overreacting." Jonathan said amused.

"Maybe. I just don't like not knowing about her. She is really pretty though. She's driving me to school tomorrow."

"How old is she?" Martha asked.

"My age. Lionel sent her here, I think he's trying to do with her what he did with Lex."

"Well son I'd like to tell you nothing's wrong but if Lionel did send her here he may be using her for his own motives. Just be careful around her."

"I will be dad. I think she likes me."

"Clark you have known this girl for five minutes."

"I know mom. She said she thought it was cute that I blushed."

"It's the Kent charm Martha. It works fast."

She shook her head. "You two." She paused for a second. "Seriously Clark be careful with her. She's his little sister. If you hurt her heart Lex may not be so forgiving."

"I will mom."


	3. First Day

After finishing his nightly rounds in and around Metropolis Clark flew back to his apartment. He discarded his disguise into the hamper and had a quick shower, he needed to wash away the day, if only he could do the same with the last 6 years then he'd be onto something.

As he nursed a beer and stared out the 5th floor window of his apartment at the city below he thought of how he got here. Lex hated him, Pete was some big shot at city hall in Gotham so they hardly ever spoke and when they did it was only because Clark was on assignment, Lana finally got on a plane and left for Paris never looking back he hadn't seen her since it all happened, Chloe was still around and she always would be, she worked at the Planet with Clark and her cousin Lois. They had dinner together at least once a week but things had changed. There was too much water under the bridge, too many things that had to be left unsaid and too much shared pain to reflect on. But they were in it together, whether it was a good thing or a bad thing he didn't know.

He didn't know why he became a reporter, maybe Chloe's incessant need for the truth all those years ago in Smallville had finally rubbed off on him, maybe because writing always came easy to him, maybe because a journalism scholarship was how he made it through college, maybe because journalism let him keep tabs on Lex while aiding in his night job. There were thousands of reasons and no reason at the same time.

But there was one reason he became Superman. She had Chloe's wit, Lex's smarts, Lana's vulnerability and his heart, she had him captivated from the moment he laid eyes on her. And she was dead because he didn't get to her in time. When Clark met Lena he knew she was unlike anyone he had ever met. She had no agenda, she didn't want anything from anyone, except maybe acceptance and even that she could live without, and she would do anything in her power to make sure people she cared for never felt an ounce of pain, especially her brother, even if that meant she had to suffer the consequences. Losing her nearly killed him and it destroyed Lex and Clark never wanted anyone to feel that kind of pain ever again, so he made it his mission to make sure he would save everyone he possibly could from that same fate. Lena Luthor's death would not be in vain, not as long as Clark Kent was around. And Clark Kent was going to be around for a very long time.

* * *

The first day of school is always hard when you're the new kid. When you're a Luthor the difficulty of that task increases ten fold.

6:00 in the morning came way too early for Lena's taste so she hit her buzzer until 6:25 when she finally rolled out of bed and got dressed. By the time she was finished getting ready she only had 10 minutes to get to Clark's and still be on time for school, not that she wanted to go but that was another story. She breezed into the dining room, nearly concussing Lex with her backpack as she went past him to grab a bagel and her coffee.

"Good morning to you too." He said dryly, not looking up from his paper.

She didn't even sit down. "I really don't have time for witty banter this morning Alex. I have 8 minutes to get to Clark's. And I really need this coffee. Plus I have to eat my bagel in the car on the way." She downed her cup in 3 mouthfuls and smeared some cream cheese on her bagel.

He just smiled.

"What's that look for?"

"Nothing."

"Liar."

"Don't you have somewhere to be?"

"Shut up. I'm going. Bye."

"Bye. Have a good day."

"Thanks, you too."

"Highly unlikely but thanks."

"K, I'm really leaving." She gave him a kiss on the forehead, leaving a lip gloss smudge, and ran out the door, shouting, "Wash off your forehead before you go to work," behind her.

When she got into her car she noticed a brown paper bag sitting on the passenger seat. "Brown bag lunch, how quaint." She said dryly as she turned the key in the ignition and sped off toward the Kent's house.

Martha Kent looked out the kitchen window and saw a midnight blue BMW M3 convertible speed into her driveway. "Clark Lena is here!" She called to her son who was STILL getting ready, if he didn't have super speed he'd never make it anywhere on time. "Get moving before you're actually late."

"So she's the new Luthor in town huh?" Jonathan asked as he came up behind Martha and they watched Lena get out of the car and walk toward the house.

"She's a pretty girl and a Luthor. This shouldn't take too long to get out of hand." Martha said concerned for the young girl, she did not belong in a place like Smallville it was too easy for her to get hurt or worse. Lena knocked on the backdoor and was quickly let in by Martha. "Hi. I'm Clark's mom."

"Hi Mrs. Kent. I'm Lena."

"I'm Clark's dad." Jonathan said as he walked up next to his wife extending a hand to Lena.

"Hi Mr. Kent." Lena said tentatively as she shook his hand.

"Your brother told you to fear me didn't he?" Jonathan said, taking in the shell shocked look on the girl's face.

"Yes, very much. I believe the words duck and cover were used."

"Nice job with the punctuality. When I called last night your brother said you were anal retentive about being on time." Clark joked as he came downstairs.

"I over slept and I've only had one cup of coffee. This is not a time to joke. Are you ready?"

"Yeah, mom can I have my lunch money?"

"I packed your lunch already."

"Oh cool, thanks." Clark grabbed his lunch off the counter and kissed his mom bye and said bye to his dad.

Lena wished she could kiss her mom bye before she left for school.

"So are you ready for your first day at Smallville High?" Clark asked as they walked to the car.

"Oh yeah, I can't wait." Lena said sarcastically.

"It won't be that bad." Clark tried to reassure her as they got in the car and went to school.

Lena let it go, not wanting to have the conversation and fly off the handle first thing in the morning. "Can you look in my lunch and see if there's anything to drink in there? I'm thirsty."

"Yeah sure." Clark opened her lunch. "There's a Dr. Pepper in here."

"No water?"

"No."

"Grrr, damn. I'll just get one at school. There is a vending machine at school right?"

"No, we drink out of a well." Clark deadpanned.

Lena just chuckled. "Okay I may have some preconceived notions about Smallville."

"Thank you. Yes we do have a soda machine, but you can grab one from the Torch, Chloe keeps the fridge stocked. There may even be some Red Bull in there if she's been ambitious this week, and in need of a caffeine rush."

"Cool. Thanks. I really don't think I'd be driving to school if I didn't have someone going with me."

"Where else would you be driving to?"

"As far away from here as humanly possible."

"Smallville isn't that bad. And most people will probably forget that whole evil Luthor thing when they meet you." Clark tried to joke.

She just gripped the steering wheel even tighter and sent an uneasy glare his way as she tired to breathe through her anxiety.

"Or not." They sat in silence for the next few miles.

"Are you looking through my lunch?" Lena asked with a smile when she heard a bag rustle.

"Yeah, just seeing what the other half brown bags it. Sushi, maybe a quiche lorainne?"

"What do you think this is Clark, the breakfast club?" Lena asked with a chuckle. "You are disturbing the harmony of my lunch mister. It's gonna get all smushed."

"Oh. Hey there's a note in here."

"Let me see that." She took the note from him and glanced at it as she drove. She smiled as she read it then folded it and put it in her pocket. She felt a little more at ease after reading it.

"Who was it from?"

"My brother. He must have put it in there when he packed my lunch."

Clark barked out a laugh. "Lex Luthor packed your lunch, that's funny."

"I'm not lying." She wasn't but she was still having trouble keeping a straight face. "And you can't tell him I told you or he'll kill me."

"I highly doubt that. I'm still getting over the mental image of Lex making a bologna sandwich."

"Peanut butter and jelly with the crusts cut off." She corrected him lightly.

They laughed even louder.

* * *

School

Lena whipped her car into the first available spot in the senior lot and she and Clark hurried into school. She got a few glances here and there but no one said anything to her. She hoped they were all wondering who the chick was with Clark and not 'oh my god another Luthor' because after all this was a small town and word traveled fast as do bullets and knives.

"I have to go to the office to drop some forms off first so I guess I'll see you later."

"It's straight down this hall and to the left."

"Thanks Clark, later."

Pete walked up to Clark as Lena walked away and they walked to their lockers together. "First day and you already got a girl, how do you do it Clark?" He asked, never taking his eyes off the rear end of the girl.

"Believe me we're not dating."

He turned to Clark once she disappeared from sight. "Well then step aside, who is the new hottie that you'll be ignoring this year in favor of Lana?"

"You really want to know Pete?" Clark asked with a smirk, he knew the news could quite possibly kill his friend right on the spot.

"Yeah, I mean it would be nice to know the name of the future Mrs. Pete Ross."

"Her name's Lena, Lena Luthor."

Pete's smile quickly left in favor of his jaw hitting the floor. "What, like a distant cousin or something?"

"No, as in sister of Lex daughter of Lionel."

"No, no way man. There is no way someone that hot could come from that family. It is not humanly possible!"

"Afraid so."

"Life is not fair!"

Clark just chuckled.

"What's not fair?" Lana asked as she came over to open her locker.

"Why does Luthor have to have such a hot sister?" Pete asked, still pouting.

"I see you've met Lena." Lana said with a smirk.

"It's not funny."

"Yes it is. You were completely enamored with her ten seconds ago and now that you know she shares genes with Lex your life has no meaning." Clark said.

"How come I'm always the last one to find stuff out around here?" Pete asked.

"Because you're always conveniently not around." Lana joked.

"Haha, well Lucy, Ricky if you're done mocking me we have a class to get to."

Lana and Clark rolled their eyes as they followed Pete to first period.

Mrs. Kringle was half way through role call when a name on her list made her think she was seeing things. "Lana Lang."

"Here." Lana raised her hand and turned back to her conversation with Chloe.

"Lena Lu-Luthor." The room went dead silent, no answer. "Lena Luthor?"

"Someone check the river for a Porche." Some random smart ass yelled out, making most of the class laugh, except for Chloe, Lana and Clark.

Pete was laughing when Clark silenced him with a glare. "What? Come on man it's funny."

Clark didn't say anything he just glared.

"Fine." Pete lowered his voice and leaned in to talk to Clark. "I only stopped because I was afraid you'd set me on fire."

Clark shook his head and chuckled, he'd gotten more relaxed about talking about his abilities with Pete, plus the room was in total chaos. At least until the door opened revealing a brunette in a jean skirt and form fitting tank top.

"Lena Luthor?" Mrs. Kringle asked the girl in the doorway.

"Yes."

"You're late." She said tersely.

"I was in the office. I have a note." She handed it to her.

"Welcome to AP English. There's an open seat next to Ms. Lang. Lana raise your hand."

"I know who Lana is." Lena said dismissively and took the seat.

Mrs. Kringle kept going through the attendance list.

"Hey what's up you look pissed off?" Chloe leaned over and whispered.

"This stupid school is so backwards." Lena whispered back. "They tried to change my schedule and put me in regular classes because they 'lost' my transcripts. Needless to say a quick call to my father fixed that, the new lab equipment is coming next week."

"Well where are your transcripts?"

"I don't know. My old school is quite disinclined to get things done expediently for me but they should be here later. Barring natural disaster and like a stampede."

Lana chuckled.

Chloe shook her head. "Oh. Let's see your schedule."

Lena passed her schedule to Chloe and Lana.

"Cool we have all our classes together."

"Ms. Sullivan, Ms. Luthor I don't think you need to be reminded that this is not a good way to start the school year. You're seniors act like it. And Ms. Luthor I don't know how things were at your old school but your father's money will not keep you in my favor or that of any other teacher in this school."

Lena was not about to be singled out by a teacher and made an example of on the first day, especially in this crap town. "And your degree will not garner respect from me until you prove I know less about literature than you do. Which I highly doubt. So how about this, I'll come to class and do my work and you can pretend you know a thing or two about literature. I won't let on that that you have no idea what you're talking about and you leave me alone." A few students snickered but most sat in awe of Lena's ballsiness.

"I believe you know where the office is."

Lena got up and started for the door. "Chloe save me a seat in physics." Then disappeared behind it.

"Damn." Pete breathed.

"Pete you can't handle her." Clark whispered.

"I know. But still, damn."

After missing Physics due to the long line of students, either with a wrong schedule or disciplinary problems, Lena was let off with a stern warning and went to her Economics class. Sure senior Econ could be thought of as a blow off class, which yeah it was, when your dad owns one of the biggest companies in the world, not to mention that the life blood of the town you now reside in, but she was okay with that decision. And her teacher who everyone referred to as Mr. John. He was a good guy, in his late twenties, single, one of the most popular teachers at the school actually, and one of the first people in the godforsaken place that didn't piss her off or appear to be inbred.

He was calling out attendance and came to Lena's name. "Lena Luthor?" He looked up waiting for a hand to shoot up.

"Here." A voice mumbled from behind Clark. Lena wasn't in the mood to be made a spectacle of again.

"I'm sorry I can't see whomever that is behind Clark. Clark could you please lean to the side?" Mr. John asked in his usual joking way.

Clark did as was asked and leaned giving Mr. John a view of Lena. Lena's face turned red as she sank lower in her seat.

"Lena Luthor I presume?" Mr. John asked as he walked up to her desk.

"Yeah." Lena said, barely above a whisper.

"Nice to meet you." Mr. John stuck his hand out to shake hers.

She shook politely and gave a small smile.

"A little word of advice, Mr. Kent makes a better door than a window. I was working on my Masters Degree at MetU when your brother was there."

Lena choked out an, "Oh," with a worried look on her face. People who knew Alex in college could harbor a grudge or two against him.

"Don't worry, we got along well. He's a good guy, you could learn a lot about business from him. Tell him I said hi."

Lena just nodded her head.

Then with a last smile he walked back to the front of the room to finish roll and start class and hand out syllabi.

Chloe leaned forward on her elbows and whispered in Lena's ear. "Teacher's pet." She teased.

Lena just chuckled. "Jealous?"

"Don't you know it."

"Alright folks this is senior economics class. Now a word to the wise I am not teaching you to do your parents taxes, or how to make a million dollars before you're twenty. We are learning how a business works and how to follow a business model. Throughout the semester you will be broken into teams of 5 and you will have to start your own corporation. In lieu of tests you will be making bi-weekly presentations and at the end of the semester your corporation will present and turn in a portfolio accounting for your progress throughout the semester. The rules and goals are in your syllabi. Any questions?"

The same smart ass from English had a comment to make right away. "Yeah is it really fair to let a Luthor work on the project? I mean she's just going to take over everyone else's companies and fire all the employees."

Lena just rolled her eyes and bit her tongue, while mentally she was envisioning him with his head lopped off.

Clark was about to unload on the guy when Chloe spoke up. "My you're witty Andrew. You're just jealous because she's smarter than you're entire family. Then again not everyone's lucky enough to have their uncle and dad be the same person. I bet you save tons of money on birthday cards." This time everyone laughed.

"You are so dead Sullivan."

"Oh I'm shaking." Chloe said sarcastically.

"Chloe, Andrew cut it out." Mr. John warned them.

Luckily for everyone the bell rang before a fight broke out. Unfortunately where teachers ruled in the classroom chaos and mob rule were at work in the halls.

Andrew and his idiotic friends decided to follow Lena and Chloe all the way to the Torch office, giving them crap the entire way.

"Hey Sullivan what does someone have to do to get on that little wall of weird of yours?"

Chloe stopped and turned around to face her tormentor. "Well Gus, in your case I'd need proof that you have higher brain function."

Lena stood next to her and chuckled.

"I don't know what you're laughing about Luthor, if anyone's a joke around here it's you and your entire family." Andrew took another dig at Lena.

"Says the boy with frosted tips. Not only are those so 2 years ago, but they weren't even that cool then."

"At least I have hair. Unlike that freak brother of yours. He's _completely_ bald right?" He said with a smirk.

Lena's face darkened, and she balled up her fists at her sides. "Don't talk about my brother."

"Uhoh 'Drew, looks like the little princess is pissed off."

"Whatcha gonna do about it, call that **_bald_**, **_freak_** brother of yours?"

"I will give you one last chance to Take. It. Back."

"What's wrong he won't come protect you he's probably off somewhere boning Kent."

Andrew and his friends looked at each other and laughed.

"Lena let it go, he's not worth it." Chloe tried to calm her friend.

Lena ignored her and got right in Andrew's face. "You are going to be very sorry you ever crossed my path."

"Really, and what are you going to do about it girly?" He said as he pushed her right shoulder with two of his fingers.

"You just made the biggest mistake of your life." Lena dropped her backpack, punched him in the nose, grabbed his wrist, twisted it behind his back and threw him against a locker, all the while applying more and more pressure to his wrist and arm.

The scene caught the attention of a few students milling about in the halls and a few classrooms full of students and teachers. One of the teachers grabbed Lena and another grabbed Andrew.

"What is going on here!" One of them yelled at the two.

Neither answered.

"Mr. Levins, Mr. Garret do you have any insight into this situation?" Neither answered, knowing what would happen to them. "Then I suggest the 2 of you get to class NOW!" The boys scrambled down the hall. "Ms. Sullivan you're being oddly quiet, do you have anything to say?"

Lena shot her a warning glance.

Chloe shrugged. "Um no, I just came out here and saw this."

"Then I suggest you get back to the paper."

"Ok then." Chloe grabbed Lena's backpack and scurried off into the Torch office.

Lena nodded her head in a 'thank you' gesture.

* * *

An hour later

Andrew and Lena sat in front of Principal Reynold's desk waiting for their respective parental figures to show up. Lena sat back in her chair with her legs crossed, glaring at Andrew who was holding an ice pack to his nose which had finally stopped bleeding.

Andrew's mom came through the door followed by Lex. Lena let out a sigh of relief when she say her brother walk in as opposed to her father. Lionel would not be up for her antics so early in the school year.

"Mrs. Jacobs, Mr. Luthor I'm sorry we have to meet so early in the school year under these circumstances." Principal Reynolds said as he shook their hands. Everyone got seated and Principal Reynolds started the meeting. "Now we usually do not have problems with Andrew so today's sudden outburst in the hall seems quite out of character for him. And Lena, while we are impressed with your academic record and your standardized test scores, thus far I don't need to tell you this is not the way to start off at a new school. Seeing the principal twice in one day, both for disciplinary action, set a bad precedent."

"She's been down here once already?" Lex asked shocked.

"Yes, it seems she and Mrs. Kringle had a butting of heads this morning. I was going to let it go but this situation can not be dealt with in the same way."

"She broke my nose." Andrew tried to get her into more trouble.

"Want me to do it again?"

"Lena not now." Lex had to wrangle her in before she broke something else.

"Anyway. I hate to do this so early in the school year but we have a zero tolerance policy in regards to fighting. They are both being suspended for the remainder of today and tomorrow."

"What's that going to do to me for football practice?"

"I'm sorry Andrew. I'll talk to coach, but you are out for the rest of the week, and you need to have that nose checked out first."

"Thanks a lot." He snapped at Lena.

"Anytime." She replied coolly.

"According to Mr. John Andrew is not entirely innocent here. Andrew were you making disparaging remarks toward Lena and Chloe Sullivan earlier in the day?" Mr. Reynolds asked.

"Andrew is this true?" His mother admonished him, while looking sheepishly toward the Luthor siblings.

"It wasn't my idea mom I swear."

"Andrew this is unacceptable behavior. Mr. Luthor I am so sorry that my son treated your sister so harshly."

"Really Mrs. Jacobs it's not your fault." Lex tired to reassure her. "And I will pay for any of Andrew's medical expenses that my sister caused."

"Oh that's not necessary."

"I insist." Lex said in a tone that signaled the subject was not up for discussion.

"What is this going to do to me for trying out for the swim team?"

"Swim team tryouts aren't until next week, so you are fine. But I do not want to have any more incidents like this one." The office secretary came in on the intercom.

"Principal Reynolds Mr. Luthor is here."

"Yes Mrs. Keeting I am speaking with him right now."

"No sir, the other Mr. Luthor." Lena's jaw dropped. "I had to call both because I couldn't get through to either of them on the first try."

"Well show him in."

"Actually his helicopter is just landing."

"Where?"

"On the football field."

"Very well then."

Lena pinched the bridge of her nose. "Oh this can't be good."

A few minutes later Lionel walked into the office in all his glory. "Principal Reynolds I hadn't anticipated a meeting so early in the school year."

Principal Reynolds got up and shook Lionel's hand. "Neither had I sir, I am sorry you had to come down here in the middle of the day."

Lionel chuckled. "Oh it's alright, the things we do for our children." Lena and Lex shared a look. Lionel regarded his children for the first time. "Lena, Lex good afternoon."

"Always a pleasure dad." Lex said in his normal tone.

"Lena what have you done this time?"

"Good afternoon to you too father." Lena said coolly, she was still pissed at Lionel for shipping her here.

"Well Mr. Luthor we were just finishing up here. It seems that an earlier confrontation in class escalated in the hall way and Lena may have broke Andrew's nose. The exact facts concerning the situation are still hazy, no one's taking full responsibility or denying what happened. But since the situation became physical both of them are being suspended until Wednesday."

"Very well. Lena I don't have to tell you how disappointed I am in you. I do not expect to have to deal with situations like this in the future. Do you understand me?"

"Yes." Lena ground out through gritted teeth.

"Very good. Alexander I trust you will be taking care of the young man's medical expenses."

"Already taken care of dad." Lex said dryly.

"Well I think everything has been taken care of here today. Lena, Andrew I will see the two of you before class Wednesday morning. Mr. Luthor, Mr. Luthor, Mrs. Jacobs, again I am sorry to have disturbed you so early in the day and the school year." Mr. Reynolds showed everyone out of his office.

Andrew and his mom left and the Luthors were leaving as well.

"I left my backpack at the Torch, I'll be back in a minute." Lena said and ran off toward the Torch office.

"Hey." Chloe said shocked when Lena ran through the door. "What's the verdict?"

"We're both suspended until Wednesday." She said walking over to the couch and grabbing her backpack.

"That's total crap. Did you tell principal Reynolds what Andrew and his friends were saying about your brother and all the crap before that and that he shoved you?" Chloe said outraged.

"Chloe I know you're right. But the fact is I still hit him and it wouldn't have gotten me less of a punishment, it would have just hurt my brother. I'd rather take the suspension than hurt him. It's bad enough my dad got called down here, and actually showed up." Lena finished with an eye roll.

"Your dad's here?" Chloe said astonished.

"What you didn't see the helicopter?"

"I so do not envy you right now. I'll see you Wednesday I guess."

"Yeah. Oh can you take Clark home today and be his ride tomorrow too?"

"Sure."

"Thanks Chloe, and thanks for before."

"No problem."

Lena gave a wave and headed back to where her father and brother were waiting for her.

When Lena got back they were arguing in the parking lot next to Lex's car.

"Lex if I can't trust you to handle a 17 year old girl how can I be expected to trust you with my company?"

"She's not a '17 year old girl' dad she's your daughter! If you spent more time with her you'd know that! And I didn't send her off to beat up jocks. He obviously did something to piss her off and she wasn't going to take it! Try praising her for standing up for herself rather than yelling at me for it!"

"I don't need to spend time with her to know she has a bad temper and a bad attitude. That is all your influence!"

"How can it be my influence? You have made it your mission to keep us as far apart as possible!"

"That's because you needed to find direction and get off that path of self destruction before dragging your sister down with you! If she has not straightened out by the end of this year you are going to be in serious jeopardy of losing everything, including your job!"

"She is a person not stock! You can't make my life contingent on Lena's moods!"

They stopped talking when they saw Lena walk up. "Is that all I am dad? Another one of your tests? Like if I don't wind up in jail or expelled Alex gets a raise?"

"Lena I didn't mean…"

"Yes you did, you just didn't want me to hear it! Go back to Metropolis and leave us alone!"

"I can see I've worn out my welcome for today." Lionel walked off toward his helicopter.

"Get in the car now!" Lex ground out through a clenched jaw.

Lena did what she was told and Lex slammed her door, almost catching her foot in it.

Lex got in on his side, he gripped the steering wheel as he spoke. "IT IS THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL LENA!"

"I'm aware of that." Lena said calmly.

"NO, NO SMART ASS REMARKS!"

"Alex I…"

He cut her off. "YOU ARE NOT TALKING YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS! YOU GOT SUSPENDED ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL AND YOU DID SO BY BREAKING A KIDS NOSE! A KID WHO'S FATHER WORKS FOR ME! AND THEN TO TOP IT ALL OFF DAD COMES TO TOWN AND RIPS ME A NEW ONE BECAUSE OF YOU! I DID NOT SIGN ON FOR THIS LENA!"

That had to be the first time in history that Alex had ever yelled at her like that. Lena's voice wavered as she spoke and tears sprang to her eyes. "I'm sorry you got stuck with me and I'm sorry I messed up and I'm sorry dad nailed you for it Alex but… you know what, never mind!" Lena got out of his car and walked to hers. When she heard Lex's car roar off she was still shaking with fear and anger.

Lena didn't come down to dinner that night, Lex didn't expect her to. He felt bad about what had happened earlier in the day and wanted to apologize to her but they were both stubborn people with quick tempers and sharp tongues. For as much as they cared for each other they were still only human. One misspoken word and they'd be at each other's throats and she'd wind up crying. He didn't want that to happen so he decided to give her space for now.

* * *

Dr. Tess English

Lena had an appointment with her psychiatrist Monday evening, and it couldn't have come at a better time.

Lena was sitting in a large overstuffed blue chair across from her Dr., with her knees folded into her chest and her arms wrapped around them.

"Lena we've been doing this for a month now. So why don't you tell me why you're here."

Lena rolled her eyes and unfolded herself, sitting with her right leg crossed over her left and her arms resting on the arms rests. "An anger management issue and a court order," Was her only response.

"I am familiar with the terms of your probation. But I want to know why you're here. What do you think caused your outburst last spring?"

"Um I walked in on my boyfriend fucking my roommate and I got pissed off so I took a softball bat to his car. Then I took off in my car and didn't stop when I saw a cop behind me, leading him on a 10 mile chase. Then when things couldn't get any worse said ex pissed me off even worse and I threw something at his head. It's not my fault wood burns. You know the story we've been over it before."

The Dr. looked down and made a note. "I thought Jessica was your roommate."

"She was and so was Parker. We lived in a 3 person."

"Oh. So back to my original question. Why are you here?"

"I got pissed off, I destroyed some stuff, didn't yield to a cop, resisted arrest, burnt down the better part of a school." Lena was getting frustrated. "You're the doctor, why don't you tell me?"

"How about what happened at school today?"

"He pushed me first."

"You said he was making some offensive comments about your brother. How did that make you feel?"

"I broke his nose. How do you think I felt?"

"You tell me."

"It made me mad. He doesn't even know my brother. No one in that fucking hick town knows anything about my family and they don't care to. I don't know why my brother just didn't let my dad shut the crap factory down and get out of there when he had the chance."

"Have you ever asked him why he was so insistent on keeping it open?"

"No. It's his business."

"What were your father and brother's reactions to you getting suspended?"

"My father yelled at my brother and then my brother yelled at me because he got yelled at."

"How did you react to that?"

"I yelled back at them."

"Is that how conflicts usually end in your family?"

"I guess. We're not big on feelings or sharing. We don't do the family meeting thing with talking sticks and safe zones."

"Lena tell me, when was the last time you cried?"

Lena looked at her confused. "I don't know. Probably when my mom died."

"Probably when your mom died? You don't remember?"

"I was 6 I really don't remember."

"Right. But in your recent memory you haven't cried."

"No. What's the point?"

"It's a letting out of emotion."

"I learned a long time ago that it doesn't solve anything, it can't fix anything. It doesn't bring people back from the dead or make someone love you, it can't make someone come home." She stopped talking.

"You don't cry because you feel it's a waste of time. Who do you want to love you?"

"We both know the answer to that question."

"You need to say it."

"I want my father to love me."

"Has he ever told you he loved you?"

"Not that I can remember. Maybe when I was little but that was a long time ago."

"How about approval? Does he show you approval?"

"Sometimes, depends on the subject."

The Dr. just nodded and made a note. "How do you feel about living in Smallville?"

"I don't know. I met a couple of people who are nice and don't piss me off. Most people still don't like Luthors though and they have no problem showing it."

"I didn't ask about the people I asked about you. How do you feel about living in Smallville?"

"I don't know. It's not like I sat up nights thinking about it."

"Well isn't that where the meteor shower was? Isn't that where your bother almost died and lost his hair? Isn't Smallville where they had the tornado that almost killed your father?"

"Yeah."

"Had you ever been to Smallville until now?"

"No, when I was little my mom was against it and my dad wouldn't take me with him ever. And as I got older there was just no reason, until now."

"Do you remember the days after the meteor shower?"

"I was 3. All I remember is a lot of people talking about it and it was on TV and my mom crying. But when people saw me they changed the channel or stopped talking. And then when my brother came home he didn't have any hair. That's all I remember."

"And the Tornado?"

"My brother called me and told me what happened. But he wouldn't let me come in because I was supposed to study abroad that summer and he didn't want me to miss that. Besides there was nothing I could do, I would have just been in the way. Plus my father's a very proud man, it's bad enough he had to admit he needed help and accept it. Having his children witness it would have drove him insane."

"So your father almost died then he was temporarily disabled and your brother's solution was to send you to a foreign country so you wouldn't get in the way and to keep your father's pride intact."

"Well he never said that but I'm not dumb."

"How long was the span of time between your father's hospitalization and the next time you saw him?"

"Christmas."

"Eight months. That's a long time. So for the third time in your life someone in your family was sick and they kept you away from them and kept you out of the loop. And this is also the second time in your life where illness has kept your father and brother separated from you for an undetermined period of time and you couldn't do anything about it."

She shrugged. "I guess. I'm the youngest, they're just doing what they think is best."

"And what do you think?"

"They still see me as a little girl who needs protecting. And they do it because it alleviates their guilt. My father's at least. My brother is stuck."

Dr. English nodded. "Alright Lena let me tell you what I think. From the moment you walked into my door I could tell that you were putting on a front because you didn't want to let anyone else in. The attitude, the anger, the condescension, the acting out and destruction. You don't want people to know the real you."

"And who am I really?" Lena said defensively.

"Intellectually you are years ahead of your peers, and most adults. Emotionally you are a child. You do not know how to process emotion, at least not the ones you deem as negative or that make you feel powerless. Between the meteor shower, Julian's death, and your mother dying, all things that happened before you were 7 years old, you were never taught how to show emotion or that all emotions are okay. On the inside you are a scared little girl who thinks her bother is going to die, who wants her mother to come back, and is seeking love and approval from her father. These little outbursts you have, they aren't random, they are part of your coping mechanism but doesn't know how to get it. And I am afraid that if you do not learn how to deal with these emotions in a constructive way you are headed toward a severe emotional breakdown."

"So what now? Is there some new drug that'll fix me? Because if you give me a prescription I'll buy copious amounts of stock in the company."

"No. I want you to log your emotions for the next week and the circumstances surrounding them. And I want you to bring it with you next week so we can discuss it."

"Great."

"Alright, that's it, hour's up. Have a good week."

"Thanks, you too."

On her way out to her car Lena checked her voicemail. Clark called Lena to tell her that he had her homework and other papers from the rest of the day. So on her way back from Metropolis she went over there to retrieve her stuff from him.

When Lena got to the Kent's house Martha told her that Clark was in the barn so she went there to find him.

"Clark?" Lena called out upon entering the large structure.

"Up here!" Clark called to her as he peered down from his loft.

Lena followed the stairs up to where he was. "Your mom said you were in here. It's a nice space you have up here." She said as she surveyed the loft around her.

"Dad calls it my fortress of solitude. It's just a place where I can get away from it all, ya know?"

"I guess." Lena shrugged.

"C'mon you're telling me that there is no place you can just hide out form everything?"

"I've never really had the luxury. There's no place to 'hide' per se in a Luthor residence. I usually wound up hiding in a closet."

"I guess you're right there."

"So we're going to ignore the white elephant?"

"You mean the one that says you broke Andrew Jacob's nose?" Clark joked.

"Yeah that one."

"Chloe told me what really happened."

"As opposed to the tabloid version?"

"Well some people are saying he made a pass at you and you kicked him in the groin, then broke his nose, because you're a lesbian. Some people are saying you had some sort of psychotic fit and took out half the football team with your car. What you did, taking the suspension so Lex wouldn't get hurt, that takes a lot of character. He's lucky to have you as a sister."

"I like the second version of that story. Of course lesbianism also has it's upside." Lena chuckled. "He doesn't think so, he's pissed at me for getting in trouble and my dad being called about it. I don't belong here. No one wants me here, not even my brother. That fact was made painfully obvious this afternoon."

"Don't say that not everyone knows you, it'll get better."

"No it won't, believe me. People talk. First I'm the new bad seed in town, then I break the starting quarterback's nose on the first day of school. To them I am the epitome of demon spawn. This is a small town in rural Kansas, to them I might as well have assassinated the president."

"Don't you think you're being as closed minded about them as they are about you? And Lex is crazy about you, you should have heard him on the phone last night. I swear I could hear him smiling."

"Clark I spent 7 years carving a niche for myself at my old school I and now thanks to my father and his crappy parenting technique I have to walk into a high school, a public high school in rural Kansas no less, and do it all over again in the next nine months. So excuse me if I am less than enthusiastic about the whole thing. As for my brother, he's 23. What 23 year old do you know that wants to finish raising his kid sister? He got stuck with me because my father doesn't want me. My dad sent me here to test Alex's management skills or something, I have no fucking clue. I'm just being used as a pawn in this game they have going on. One pushes and one pulls, and I just get hurt. No one wants me." She could feel tears in her eyes, she hated crying so she fought against it.

"Come here." Clark walked over to her and held her against his chest. "Your brother wants you around."

"Really, then why didn't he tell any of you about me or me about you?" She asked through sniffles as she fought against the tears. "And why did he let our father keep us apart for so long. Until Saturday I hadn't seen my brother in over 3 years and it's not like I didn't want to. 3 years, Clark." Her voice cracked so she stopped.

"I can't answer those questions, I really can't. And I am sorry your dad is such an ass. But you have your brother back now and he's not going anywhere. Don't be mad at him for things he can't control." Clark continued to hold her in his arms.

A few minutes later they were sitting on the couch. "I have a question for you."

"Shoot."

"Why did you get expelled from your old school?"

"I found out my boyfriend was sleeping with one of my fridens. And to make a long story short we got into an argument and I accidentally burnt half the school down."

"Oh." Clark said with a surprised look on his face.

"I'm not an arsonist or anything."

"Well good because if you haven't noticed like everything in this town is flammable."

"I'll just break noses."

They laughed.

"Thanks Clark."

"You're welcome."

Lena took her papers and went home and wrote her first entry in her emotions journal.

Later that night Lena was in the TV room that adjoined her room watching TV. She was sprawled out on the couch, in her pajamas, with one foot over the back, one on the cushions, a remote in one hand and the other between her head and a pillow.

"So what do you have planned for tomorrow?" Lex asked as he walked in startling her.

She nearly jumped off the couch but quickly regained her composure and fixed her posture as she sat up. "Nothing really. I hadn't planned on having an extra day of break." She fidgeted with the remote.

He breathed a chuckle and sat down next to her. "I didn't think that was a part of your plan."

She just shrugged.

When he didn't get a reaction from her he got more serious. "I am sorry for yelling at you earlier. I was mad at dad for being an ass and I took it out on you."

"It happens, I'm not exactly innocent. I did break a guys nose on the first day."

"What happened there? I'm still not understanding what caused all that."

She folded her knees into her chest and hugged them again. "Look it doesn't matter. I should have kept my temper in check."

"You're a Luthor that can be a full time job."

They both chuckled.

She looked over at him. "Do you want me here?"

Her question took him by surprise. "Of course I do. I was shocked when dad told me you we're coming. But god Lena you're my sister and having you here is great."

"Then why didn't you tell them about me? And why didn't you tell me about any of them, especially Clark. He saved your life. And if you missed me so much why didn't you come back to Metropolis when dad gave you the chance instead of staying here and not seeing me until this week?"

"Lena I need you to listen to me very carefully. I didn't tell them about you because I didn't know what to say and I missed you too much to think about it let alone talk about it. And I also would have had to admit that I hadn't seen you in so long because A: I was kicked out of Princeton, and I really didn't need to give people another reason not to like me. And B: because I didn't want to have to admit to myself that dad was right. Up until last year or so I was not good for you. I was in a destructive pattern and I know how much you look up to me and the last thing I want is for you to get hurt because of something you saw me do."

"I know you don't want to hear this but I'm a big girl and I am perfectly capable of making bad decisions on my own, without your influence. I've been doing it for a long time." Lex just nodded, she was right he didn't want to hear it. "What about the other thing, why didn't you come home?"

"I didn't want to. I didn't want to be around dad again. I like it here. Plus I couldn't let the town fold like that, it wouldn't have been right. Once you get used to it, it's not a bad place. I know your experience here is limited but a lot of the people are nice and they're good people. You just have to give them a chance and they will give you a chance. I know it sucks you want your old life back, minus the scarring details, the one where you're normal not an oddity."

"Who knew that there was actually a place in the world where being a Luthor would be considered normal?" They shared another laugh. "It's cause of Clark isn't it?"

He looked at her puzzled.

"You couldn't let the town fold because of Clark. He saved your life but there's more to it than that. What is it?"

"He was the first person ever to look at me like a person not a name. When he saved my life he did it because that's the kind of person he is. He doesn't want anything from me but me, he has no hidden agenda. He reminded me that there are people like that in the world, before that I didn't care what happened to me. It was a wake up call."

She just nodded in understanding.

"As for my reason for coming in here. I have a meeting in Metropolis tomorrow afternoon. Do you want to come up there with me and do some shopping while I'm held hostage in a board room?"

She thought for a second. "You're going to have to sweeten the deal a bit more for me to get up and dressed tomorrow."

"Fine, I will let you drive the Ashton Martin I have at the penthouse."

"Best big brother ever," she said with a smile.

"I thought you'd like that. But if you so much as scratch that car…"

"You'll what, buy a new one," she joked.

He just smirked. "Fine, I see idle threats hold no weight with you." He reached over and gave her a hug. "Night Lena."

She squeezed back. "Night Alex." He got up to leave. "Oh wait!" She called to him making him turn back to her. "One of my teachers knows you."

"Really, which one?"

"Mr. John, he said he was at Met U at the same time as you. He says hi."

"I remember him. He wasn't half a bad guy."

"He said the same about you."

Lex smirked. "Night Lena."

"Night Alex."

He left and she went back to watching her show and contemplating her new life.


End file.
